My mom, who taught me all I needed to know to be creative, intelligent and successful, passed away last night. She was diagnosed with stomach cancer last year and has been fighting ever since. I thank God she’s now delivered from her pain and suffering, but mourn the loss that she means to my life, my sisters’ lives, my brother’s life and all our friends and family beyond.
Photo by Flickr’s willshootI’m a big fan of personal finance stories in the Washington Post, so I was pretty interested in this article recently that some brides are saving money by having a destination wedding. To me, that seems counterintuitive — wouldn’t having your wedding somewhere else make the costs skyrocket? But I make sense of the entire paradox — eventually.
The biggest cost of a wedding is people — bridesmaids, groomsmen, sponsors, guests. Most people would invite everyone and their mommas, daddies, nieces and nephews, if you think about it. So by having your wedding in some exotic locale, say Maui like in the photo above, you end up pre-excluding some because a lot of people usually can’t afford to fly somewhere, put themselves up in a hotel, and give you a gift. That’s just reality.
From the article:
These unromantic downers are forcing couples to take a hard look at what they’re spending on their special day. In many cases, the new economic reality means downsized ambitions. Couples are scaling back on their guest lists, replacing filet mignon with chicken, and crossing out honeymoon plans to Italy because of the sinking value of the dollar. Some are choosing exotic destination weddings instead of hometown fetes to keep their guest numbers low. Others are making small cuts where they can: getting professionals to print invitations but stuffing envelopes themselves or replacing expensive peonies with cheaper roses.
…skip
Richard Markel, director of the Association for Wedding Professionals International, estimates that couples are spending $1,500 less this year on the average $28,000 wedding.
Tough times also are hitting wedding vendors: photographers, caterers, planners. “People are coming in with smaller budgets, but we’re trying to make the most of what they have to still give them a special experience, and if that means losing $100 to $150 for us because of the cost of a better quality of meat, that’s okay for us,” said Dan Capobianco, president of American Catering in Centreville.
Experts say there are many ways to cut wedding costs. “This is the time to prioritize what you need and realize that there is always something in your budget” to economize, Markel said.
The article continues on to say that hometown celebrations often come with guest lists of 200, 300 or more, but when it comes to destination weddings, it mind end up being 50. That’s a lot of $100 dinners you’re cutting from your wedding budget. Read the whole thing its very enlightening.
Anyway, there’s another plus. If you bring your wedding to one of these resorts, chances are you won’t need decorations. I know, I know, as a former wedding decorator I shouldn’t be advocating for no decorations. But I’m also in love with the beauty of nature. And if you’ve got a view like the one from the pictured Maui wedding, you really don’t want any flowers distracting from the simple beauty of your surroundings.
When I was decorating weddings, my weapon of choice was always fabric. A variety of fabrics, actually — English netting, organza, sequined fabrics, whatever I could get my hands on. But it seems there is a lot of confusion when it comes to whether you’re looking at tulle or English netting.To me, the distinction is easy. Above, I used English netting on this cake table for my friend Cathy (for whom I was a bridesmaid). English netting is soft to the touch, it floats, flows and hangs easily. English netting, in my experience, has been best used for accents to more high-impact fabrics like organza. English netting is what you might actually wear, its so soft and nice to feel against the skin.
I believe there are many different types of tulle, and above is an example of what I call a crunchy variety. Tulle for many brides can be preferable — its cheaper and its easier to mold. Its often used for giveaways and favors like this one.
Photo by Flickr’s Details of the Day
Photo by Flickr’s Wedding or Party DecorationsI have generally used English netting sparingly, but it can be very pretty when used in excess, like the gazebo above. A set up like this is not difficult, even for you DIY brides — buy a couple dozen yards of English netting (seriously), attach one end to the top, let it fall to the ground, and loop it back up. Repeat as many times as the fabric will allow and feel free to vary the lengths. But I gotta say, recreating a set up like this one will require several yards of English netting, and it can get expensive. Maybe try different fabrics.
Photo by Flickr’s mcwaneeventsCheck out this ceremony set up. Spectacular, no? Ceiling and wall decorations, however, take a lot of time, so remember that when you’re booking your site, if this is the type of decor you want. The fabric hanging from the walls and ceilings of this tent have to be English netting because I don’t believe tulle can hang like that. Or maybe it can, but you probably have to shell out for the more expensive varieties. Don’t forget to check out that pretty little backdrop. I believe those are stargazers and gerber daisies hanging along the backdrop.
Now, I need your help. I have tons of pictures but am unsure of what y’all want. Do you want to see more pictures of tulle, English netting, organza, etc? Do you want to see more about individual flowers? Or do you like the weird wedding asides? Let me know, because if not, I’m just going to keep doing what I’m doing.
This is not really in the realm of wedding decorating, but still — its all creative ideas, right? A friend of the wedding decorator, Amy Chen, is an assistant editor at Budget Travel magazine and wants ideas for girlfriend getaways and bachelorette parties.
Photo by Flickr’s n1kk1best Her asking me was basically her first mistake, since I’ve only been an active member of a bridal party twice, beyond my stints as a flower girl. So, I have no idea. Basically, what she’s wondering is: what would you like to do like to do with your girlfriends beyond wine tasting and spa treatments.
Anyway, the Girl Getaways site is actually chock full of cool ideas. And because they’re ideas from Budget Magazine’s staff, they’re budget minded — thank God! Because from my most recent experience as a bridesmaid, I was shocked at how expensive being a bridesmaid can be. I don’t know how you repeat offenders can afford it! I don’t even know how repeat wedding guests can afford it!
At any rate, Girl Getaways did have one really cool bachelorette planning article recently. I swear I wanted to send this to every bride-to-be (and a few former brides) to demonstrate that you could do a whole heckuva lot more than just go to the spa and get sloshed. Their best idea? The Beach House Rental:
Dive in by determining what’s most important to you. For the house: Is there a private pool or hot tub? How many bedrooms and bathrooms will you need? For a group of women, assume that no one wants to share beds and figure on one bathroom for every four people. For the location: Keep in mind you’ll need a break from the sun, and zero in on communities where you can walk to shops, galleries, restaurants, and bars, or join a lively boardwalk scene.
Beachhouses in high season are generally rented by the week, so you’ll find a better selection of weekend rentals in shoulder season (May or September in Cape May, N.J., or April in North Carolina’s Outer Banks, for example). Locales with lots of housing stock also work well for a weekend rental; you may not be able to find a weekend rental in Martha’s Vineyard in July, but you probably can nab a lovely place in Myrtle Beach or Hilton Head, S.C.
Work out how you’re going to handle chores like cooking and cleaning ahead of time. Many rental services build in a cleaning fee or let you add a cleaning service for an additional charge. If none of you are inclined to spend time in the kitchen, look into hiring a personal chef or assign a team to breakfast, another to lunch, and agree to eat dinners out.
Have some activities like beach volleyball and Frisbee on standby for those who can’t sit still and, in case the weather doesn’t comply, be ready with board games, a poker set, or guilty-pleasure movies and popcorn.
Something Extra Hire a yoga instructor to lead a group class on the beach. There’s nothing like doing sun salutations in the sand while facing the wild blue yonder. Call a local yoga studio or try yogafinder.com.
My contribution to this idea? Reserve a Crystal Cove Beach Cottage. Sigh. Can you imagine how restful and rejuvenating your bachelorette party could be? Ahhh. That’s my kind of party.
So if you were wondering what to cut from your mutating wedding budget first, here’s what everyone voted on what to snip first: transportation. In most cases, this means that stretch limo, Hummer, Range Rover, Audi — whatever. (I really did see a stretch Audi on Flickr.)
Photo by Flickr’s philippebiernySo what does this all mean for you brides who must still get from Point A (the church) to Point B (the reception)? It could mean any number of things. Heck, it could mean a golf cart for you and your new hubby. This may be a little too out there for some, but if you happen to have your church and your reception in a relatively small, low-trafficked city, I think it could be a fun option — sort of like the whole horse carriage thing, without the horses. Imagine all the fun you’ll have waving at drivers as you go!
Photo by Flickr’s urbanshutterbugTrains seem to be a very popular option. I’m a big fan of trains myself, even though I’m from Southern California — as a license-less college student, I used to haul train from Orange County to L.A. every day. That’s another story. This appears to be an Amtrak train, and Amtrak just happens to have a page where you can request group reservations for 20 or more. Of course, you never know if they’re going to stick it to you or give you a discount for a big group. If this is something you do, let me know.
Photo by Flickr’s ohdebbieoAnd, as I noted before, subways are an environmentally friendly and inexpensive option. I’m not clear if the photo above was taken in France, though. Anyway, this would be a great option for someone getting married with good public transportation. Here in Los Angeles, that might be a tad difficult — maybe it could work if you were getting married at Our Lady of the Angels in downtown and having a reception at, say, the Renaissance at Hollywood and Highland or the Sheraton or Hilton at Universal CityWalk. Of course, then you have to wonder — what will the guests do with all their cars? Yeah.
Photo by Flickr’s coach_staceyThe above photo is a bride (rocking a non-white dress, no less) and groom….in a canoe! Now, I don’t know for sure if they were being taken to their reception, but it is labeled wedding transportation. At any rate — how cool is this?? I would love to be rowed across the lake to my reception.
Here in America, I think wedding cupcakes are the alternative du jour to a full on wedding cake. But is that true?
Photo by Flickr’s honto
Because, apparently, wedding cakes made of cheese are taking New Zealand by storm, according to this article. Hat tip to Doris for finding it!
Photo by Flickr’s melodrama.ca
From the article:
Canterbury Cheesemongers co-owner Sarah Aspinwall said the wedding cheese was a growing trend overseas and, in New Zealand, was requested mainly by couples returning from their OE.
“I guess some people don’t like traditional fruitcakes very much and perhaps have a real passion for cheese,” she said.
“It is a delicious thing to have at the end of a big feast, rather than something sweet.”
The cake is made by stacking an assortment of round cheeses to resemble a traditional cake, and is served with crackers and fruit.
That appears to be the case with both above — pretty simple wheels of cheese stacked on top of each other, or in the case of the second picture, four quarters of different cheeses laid out to form one wheel, plus another wheel of cheese on top. But don’t think cheese can’t be decorated. Oh no.
Photo by Flickr’s emilykreed
Hopefully, this couple doesn’t mind being on this blog, but they are standing in front of one impressive cheese tower there. Its decorated with all kinds of colorful fruit, what looks like salad greens and bright flowers. However, I wonder how hard it must be to cut the cheese? (Hee, hee, I couldn’t help it. Sorry.)
Photo by Flickr’s Miss V Lemon
Here’s another pretty impressive multi-tiered cake of cheese. I couldn’t even tell you what kind of cheeses those were. Those round fruits that are whole and cut look to be figs, plus there are grapes, strawberries and that orange fruit under that extra big thick wheel of cheese. And its all sitting on top of a pretty silver stand.
Photo by Flickr’s The Cake Fairy
This cake is a little less like your traditional tiered cake — it’s got a pretty thick base, but appears to be several ingredients down there — it looks like custard filling the layers of cheese, plus nuts, figs and gerber daisies. Then, a narrow tower of cheese layers topped with what looks like a thick wheel of blue cheese. I may be getting this all wrong, seeing as how I know nothing about cheese. Feel free to correct me in the comments.
Photo by Flickr’s rbrwr
This cake of cheese, I think, is my favorite. They used several, visually different wheels of cheese and used very colorful flowers and red cherries to decorate and topped it with Princess Leia and Luke Skywalker. Too cool!
I’m of the opinion that weddings are the type of affair you would like to hand off to someone experienced that you trust. However, I did just up and get married without much fanfare, so take that philosophy with a grain of salt. Nonetheless, if you are the type who taking care of everything herself, then FiftyFlowers.com is for you.
In a nutshell, FiftyFlowers can put together together centerpieces for you and ship them to you — all you have to do is put them on the tables. OR, you can pick out your favorite flowers — say mini lilies and stargazers — and they’ll cut them and ship them to you, so you and your crew (friends, bridesmaids, relatives, what have you) can arrange them the way you want them arranged.
For example, check out this mini sunflower corsage. They can arrange these mini sunflowers as a boutonniere. Let me tell you, this is useful — my mom used to say that the personal bridal flowers were the most work, as they are the most intricate of the vast variety of wedding flowers out there. So if you decide to do your flowers yourself, but have to bite the bullet for your personal flowers, this is not a bad way to go.
And while delivery of personal flowers can be a pill (trust me, I was a delivery person many a time), their delivery boxes are impressively well made to keep the flowers safe from being crushed against one another.
They were even bold enough to list their prices right up front — 20 stems of mini calla lilies for $79.99. And they have a huge assortment of fresh rose petals, ready to ship right to you.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m a cheap bastard. So I would probably spend the gas and waste my time going into downtown to get my own flowers, if I were so inclined to do my own flowers for my wedding (which, as I mentioned, I was not, but that’s an entirely different story). But you might not be near a large flower market like the one available here in L.A., or maybe you want a certain flower you can’t seem to find. This is a good option. And, I’ll do you a favor.
I have a postcard they were handing out. It says they’re giving a Show Special — 5% off your total order. Just enter discount code: BRIDE. Easy as pie.