Money-saving wedding planning tips

Flickr photo by Daniel Chang

Flickr photo by Daniel Chang

Getting engaged and married is a rite of passage, but why oh why is it so expensive? I have a few friends experiencing sticker shock as they plan their upcoming nuptials, and all I can do is shake my head in sympathy. Depending on your geographic location, weddings cost an average of more than $28,000 these days, which is not easy on your personal finances.

Fortunately, there are ways to save on your wedding, but these tips have to be considered from the very beginning — before you even set a date. Still interested? Read on.

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When planning a wedding, secure a venue first

Planning a wedding can be a bewildering experience. But once you’ve secured the fiance and figured out a date, I firmly believe the first thing you should tackle in planning a wedding is finding a venue.

(Stock image by katman1972)

Stock image by katman1972

Why the venue first? Because it’ll probably be your biggest expense. And when it comes to big expenses, its generally better to secure the best price you can get early on, rather than get hit with exorbitant fees the closer you get to your wedding date. It’s pretty much impossible to book a wedding venue three months in advance, and you have to be wicked lucky six months out. A good rule of thumb is to secure a wedding venue a year in advance.

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Now that you’re engaged, what’s next?

There is a huge, billion-dollar industry that banks on the fact that women have been dreaming of their BIG DAY since they were little girls. But I think that’s not necessarily the case anymore. More and more women are focusing on their careers much more so than on their dream weddings, so when one of those women finds themselves with an engagement ring on their finger, the next thought is, “now what?” I understand. I was one of those women. So if a princess bride wedding isn’t your cup of tea, well, I can help you.

(Stock image by lisafanucchi)

(Stock image by lisafanucchi)

I have a friend, a very good friend, who I have known since we were in college and who one of the few people present at my impromptu wedding by the sea. She is one of the ladies I know who got engaged over the holidays. Now, while she has been very career focused, she has also been very clear in her desire to get married and have children one day. Notice that that doesn’t include a focus on the wedding day.

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Plan a Costco wedding

I can think of one person who might truly consider a all Costco-planned wedding, if he was marrying a woman who would be amenable to the idea. He loved him some Costco — would even drive 20 minutes out of his way in order to get a Costco pizza.

I’ve previously extolled the virtues of Costco’s wedding-centric possibilities — like bridal flowers and vases and candles — but they’ve really stepped up their game by adding wedding dresses and one-of-a-kind engagement rings. (And really, we’ve heard of wackier wedding stunts, right? Like the 99-cent Stores wedding?)

First, let’s address the jewelry. I’m sure we were all aware that Costco sold jewelry, yes? But did you know they could look like this, which, by the way, is a princess cut diamond wedding set? I’m not even that much into jewelry, and even I think this would look mighty fine on my left ring finger. I am, by the way, hoping for an upgrade, maybe once I pop this second baby out or maybe around our 10th anniversary, which is really not that far off. Start saving, honey!
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Light up your wedding decorations

Lighting is actually a huge component to any decor, as any interior decorator or theater stage manager might tell you. And even though brides usually prefer afternoon ceremonies and evening receptions, its often overlooked to the detriment of the decorations so painstakingly wrought (and paid for).

Candles are usually the choice of lighting, and candles are a good, albeit small choice. They also can’t really be lit in flower arrangements for fear of sparking a fire. The alternative? Electric and batter-powered lights. Above, a sweetheart table at the Our Lady Of Angels Cathedral gets some major background lighting from DJ lights.


Most lighting is relatively subtle, but with DJ lights you can get really colorful. I don’t recall where this reception was, but subtle it was not. Not only was every arrangement topped with silver-sprayed greens, the tables were decorated with silver and pink fabric on the riser and silver and teal blue fabric on the floor-level tables. Oh, and did you not see the pink spotlights and under-the-table light? Wow. This wouldn’t have been my choice, frankly, but they loved it.

Incidentally, I do love doing under the table lights, but it can be difficult. Most long lamps, you know, the flat kind you put a long bulb into? Those are usually plug-ins and not battery-operated so you have to also do some finagling with extension cords and tape (to tape it all down; having a bride trip over the lights would not be good). But the effect is so nice.

Lighting is a must for points in the room you want to be a focus — at a wedding, this is the head/sweetheart table and the cake table. Above, the cake is old fashioned (to me) but the backdrop is very pretty. And when the cake is eaten and taken away later, it’s a nice place to take pictures.

But lighting is also a must for ambiance. I found some good examples on Flickr, of course.

Photo by Flickr’s JHunt94

This was a simple but very effective use of Christmas lights. Those eaves are nice, but look so much more dressed up with those casually strung Christmas lights entwined with some tulle. It also helps brighten the room, which was unfortunately a little dark.

Photo by Flickr’s eventswithdesign

Here’s another good example of using the vertical space. I love these round paper lanterns and wish I could use them at home — but my husband is not a fan. But they give you extra lighting, they distract from those rusty fluorescent lights further up and give some softly lit ambiance. I wish there had been a photo of this room at night.

Photo by Flickr’s nathancolquhoun

Here’s a good combo — lighting softened with fabric decorations. Look at all those details — overhead lights softened by the sheets of fabric (not sure what kind, it doesn’t look like tulle), trees strung with lights and attached to the posts, the paper lanterns, the hanging lights. Talk about ambiance.

I would expect nothing less from someone who calls themselves the Christmas Light Pros of Indianapolis. This is an amazing space made even more gorgeous by well placed lights. They made good use of all those posts (often a hindrance to most room layouts, since they might inhibit the placement of tables or chairs), good use of all those eaves, good use of those windows and they even light up the decorations. I would daresay they even stole the show from the flowers. Very, very nice.

At any rate, if you are on a budget and you want to light things up — make a trip to your local Big Lots and stock up on Christmas lights. It’ll really make things beautiful.
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Make your list, check it twice

With so many brides in full planning mode, I figured this would be the best time to revisit an article I found on Yahoo a million years ago (probably last summer). The article addresses some of the financial pitfalls of having a wedding planner with allegiances that sometimes clash — keeping the client (you, the bride) happy and making as much money as s/he can. The first four of the Top 10 Things your Wedding Planner Won’t Tell You:

1. “Something old, something new and everything over the top.” Weddings sure aren’t what they used to be. A sharp jump in what couples are willing to spend has boosted the wedding biz to a $120 billion industry, according to David Wood, president of the Association of Bridal Consultants. Today’s nuptials, costing $27,000 on average, tend to be “much grander,” Wood says. And the grander the affair, the more a couple needs help putting it together. Enter the wedding planner, a profession that emerged in the 1950s. Once catering to the wealthy elite, wedding planners have gone mainstream in recent decades, doubling their numbers over the past three years, to 20,000. Some 270,000 couples hired planners in 2006, up from 200,000 in 2003.
2. “You say you need a reference? Well, you’re looking at her.” When Keisha Barnes and Christopher Johnson, of Cerritos, Calif., first met with a wedding planner, they say she showed up an hour late, then took them to see churches much too far away. After the next appointment, when she recommended Lutheran churches (the couple are nondenominational Christian), they began researching venues on their own. “I felt like I was the wedding planner and that I was servicing her,” Barnes says. “She clearly had no idea what she was doing.” Since wedding planning requires no formal training, anyone can hang out a shingle, and a growing number of former brides are doing just that.
3. “I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you calm, cool and oblivious.” Just 15 minutes before setup, wedding planner Sasha Souza, of Napa, Calif., found out that the deejay she’d booked had been arrested. In a panic, she called up a sub, who lived three hours away, and told him to get there ASAP. What did she tell the bride? Nothing.
4. “I won’t necessarily be there on your big day.” As the industry continues to grow, wedding consulting has gotten more specialized and confusing. Planners now offer tiers of service, from full (meaning they manage the entire process from start to finish and charge about 10 to 15% of the total wedding budget) to partial (they select the photographer, caterer and other vendors for an hourly rate of, say, $25) to day-of (they oversee the event as it happens, usually for a flat fee). In addition, many venues now offer complimentary “wedding planning” as part of their package.

Read the full article for the last 6 things, plus more details.

And as a bonus, as I searched for the image atop this post, I came across Wedding Planning Software — a list of downloadable programs that you can use to organize your seating chart, plan your wedding schedule or keep track of RSVPs. Sweet. Most of them, however, are Windows only programs – sorry Mac brides.
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